


Self Sacrificing Idiot

by spinsters_grave



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: M/M, VLD fanfic remix, coran is gone from mentions of the fic, how should I tag thisss??, i.e. this idea wasn't mine, rewrite of season 2 ending, shiro stays
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-29
Updated: 2017-08-29
Packaged: 2018-12-21 10:51:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,871
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11942598
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spinsters_grave/pseuds/spinsters_grave
Summary: Lance doesn't know what he's worth. What's a guy to do?





	Self Sacrificing Idiot

**Author's Note:**

  * For [shirosquared](https://archiveofourown.org/users/shirosquared/gifts).
  * Inspired by [Smile For Me](https://archiveofourown.org/works/11952270) by [shirosquared](https://archiveofourown.org/users/shirosquared/pseuds/shirosquared). 



He didn’t know what he was doing. 

 

That was the only possible reason Lance was floating in  _ space— _ the only possible reason Lance would be this specific flavor of self-sacrificing idiot. 

 

“Oh, Lance, no,” Keith whispered, too soft to be heard. “No.”

 

“C’mon, Blue,” Lance muttered over the comms. “Come on, baby, let’s go, Blue, let’s go _ — _ !”

 

“Lance, get back in Voltron  _ right now,”  _ Shiro shouted over the comms. Lance willfully ignored him. “Lance!”

 

“Paladins!” Allura's voice. “What is going on out there? Why is Lance not inside Voltron?”

 

Lance apparently couldn’t hear them all, or he was ignoring everything, because he just kept pushing and pushing at the leg of Voltron. What was he  _ doing?  _ Keith could only watch, his heart in his throat. 

 

A purple glow from the direction of Zarkon’s ship caught Keith’s eye, and he started to chant, “No, no no no no no…” until he thought his words might make a difference. 

 

Slowly, Voltron began to move. Keith looked at his controls—no, they were still out of commission, powered down. It must have been—

 

The beam that Keith thought he could stop with a desperate prayer shot out, and Keith thought for a split second,  _ This is it, we’re done for, I’m so sorry, I’m so sorry for everything I did and that everyone is dead— _

 

And then it missed them. But it didn’t miss Lance. 

 

His anguished cry was probably the worst thing Keith had ever heard in his entire life. He couldn’t stop the equally anguished  _ “Lance!”  _ that tore itself through his throat, though everyone else said the exact same thing at the exact same moment. 

 

Keith felt his limbs go weak, the sort of weak that wouldn’t support his weight if he tried to stand up. He  _ hated  _ being weak. He clenched his hands around the controls and pushed them forward, even though he knew nothing would happen. “Guys, we  hav e to get Lance out of here. We  _ have  _ to get him back to the Castle—”

 

Voltron split apart, five tiny lions scattered to the void of space. Keith’s dashboard flickered, then roared to life, along with Red’s spirit and anger. 

 

“Ha!” Keith shouted. “I’m back online. Guys?”

 

“Green is good to go,” Pidge said. 

 

“Yellow is all accounted for!” Hunk said. 

 

“I’m back up too,” Shiro said. “Lance?”

 

There was an awkward silence over the air. Keith swallowed thickly. 

 

“I’ll take him back to the Castle,” Keith said. “You guys attack Zarkon. We can’t lose focus of the reason we came here, remember?”

 

“Right,” Shiro said, “right. Pidge, Hunk, you’re with me. We’ll…” Keith tuned out of Shiro’s directions and turned to Lance and Blue. Blue was online as well; she nudged her paladin gently with her nose, trying to get him awake. 

 

Keith jetpacked out of Red and beelined it toward Lance. Lance’s helmet was closed tight, and he was breathing normally, so Keith gathered him in his arms and brought him inside Red. Blue followed them to the Castle. 

 

The shouts of battle followed Keith through the halls, Lance hanging limply from his arms. Coran meet him in the pod room, and Keith stood Lance inside, not bothering to change him out of his flight suit. 

 

Lance’s eyes fluttered open, and Keith's hands stilled on his stomach. 

 

“Keith?” Lance murmured. “Hey, have you… has anyone told you you look cute when your face gets all scrunched up like that?”

 

“Lance?” Keith asked, but Lance had already slipped away again.  _ “Lance?” _

 

Keith sighed, then slid the pod closed. “Dammit,” he muttered. 

 

He rushed back to his lion. Red was waiting for him, her jaw wide open. The second he sat in his chair, Red flew out of the hangar, ready for action. 

 

Shiro, Hunk, and Pidge were all holding their ground against Zarkon in his armor. Keith yelled in anger and an emotion he couldn’t describe and fought alongside his friends. 

 

“Guys, we  _ need  _ a plan,” Shiro yelled over the comms. “Does anyone have any ideas?”

 

“How about we form Voltron?” Lance’s voice came over the comms, pretending to be cocky as ever but Keith could hear the obvious weakness he was trying to hide. 

 

As Blue flew out of the Castle, Shiro spoke. “Lance, you need to be resting. You took the whole force of that blast. Your quintessence must be critically low.”

 

“I’m fine,” Lance drawled, and Keith imagined him flipping a hand at them insolently. “You guys are… you all are too serious without me.”

 

“Lance, seriously, you sound like you’re about to pass out,” Pidge said. 

 

“Hey, I was, uh, thinking,” Lance began. 

 

“Was it hard?” Pidge muttered. 

 

“No. Thank you, Pidge. So like, but anyway, you know how Keith’s eyes are really purple? You think that’s like, because he’s Galra, or what? Do you think he can bond with other Galra dudes? Just throwing ideas out there.”

 

Keith groaned. He didn’t want to think about being Galra, and he didn’t want other people to think about him being Galra. “Lance, we don’t have time for this, we’ve gotta get you out of here so you can rest!”

 

“Relax,” Lance said, just as flippantly as he always was. “I’m fine, I’ve got this. Let’s just form Voltron and kick Zarkon’s butt!”

 

“Ohhh-kay, you know—” Hunk began. “Guys, I really hate to be the voice of reason here, always, but we are fighting an overpowered tyrant here with indestructible armor and he is  _ coming right towards us so let’s just form Voltron right now so we don’t become tiny pieces of space dust!” _

 

“Fine!” Shiro shouted, and Keith winced in his chair. “Form Voltron!”

 

Instantly, through the bond, Keith could feel Lance’s feeble attempts at trying to be a hero, as well as Shiro’s anger at Lance for trying to  _ kill _ himself. Hunk was desperate. Pidge was determined. Keith didn’t know what he felt. 

 

“Form sword!” Shiro’s orders were tense and short, but Keith stuck his bayard into its slot and twisted. There always was a moment where he didn’t know what he was doing or what was going on when the sword formed. There was just a bright light, and a moment where the war wasn’t happening. 

 

“Pidge, shield!” The formation of the shield was soundless in space, but Keith knew from when they were in atmo that the sound of Voltron’s wings crashing together could be deafening. 

 

They prepared themselves just in time to be hit by Zarkon and flung backwards. Zarkon came with them and hit Voltron’s torso again and again and again. Shiro's anger and determination could be heard through the bond, but he made no sounds over the comms. 

 

Voltron crossed his arms and pushed back, like a defense player in football. Keith thought his head might be ripped off with how fast they moved. 

 

Before Zarkon could make a move, Voltron’s sword was held to his throat, and they swung. Keith ducked his head down low—tried to make himself smaller overall—and let Shiro take control of his lion before he almost threw up.

 

Voltron charged. There was a moment—it was odd—Keith didn’t feel Shiro through the bond anymore, and then he couldn’t feel  _ himself,  _ and his nausea doubled. Tripled. 

 

When they all got back to themselves, Shiro had his bayard, and everyone whooped and cheered and Keith said, “You mean you’ve got  _ your _ bayard” in the most gentle tone he could muster. 

 

Their sword went up in flames. Keith could feel the heat from his cockpit, and he wondered why the lack of oxygen didn’t snuff the fire. 

 

They stabbed Zarkon.  _ Keith  _ stabbed Zarkon—he laughed once, in triumph. They did it. He was gone. 

 

Lance's weak cough cut through the comms, and instantly, everyone quieted. 

 

“Hey Keith,” Lance muttered, and Keith had no idea what he was about to say and there was no way to prepare himself for this— “if I make it through this… you’ll go out with me, right?”

 

Keith was silent for all of half a minute. Lance coughed a couple times, and Keith could feel Pidge’s smile through the bond. 

 

“Okay, first of all, you’re not dying,” Keith began. “What? We’re taking you back to the Castle  _ right now _ to get you all healed up,  _ right guys?” _

 

There were affirmatives all over the comms. 

 

“And then we’ll see,” Keith said, much softer than before; so soft he didn’t think Lance had heard him. “Lance?”

 

No response, so Voltron wheeled back to the Castle and disbanded. Blue landed in her hangar without any interference from the others, though it was rougher than it should have been. 

 

Keith was the one to retrieve Lance and put him upright in his pod, which had been clearly abandoned the moment Keith was out of the room. Coran stood by it, a guilty expression on his face. Keith didn’t listen to whatever he was saying and instead fixed up the pod. Again. 

 

He watched Lance, in just his flight suit (he hadn't even put his armor back on), wash over with blue light. Keith liked to think his breathing evened out, but there wasn’t any way to know. He just… he didn’t know.

 

* * *

 

It took three hours for Lance to wake up, and when he did, he insisted on putting brightly colored band-aids on all the places where his cuts would have been.  _ For the aesthetic,  _ he’d said. Hunk fixed him up with a cup of space tea and a space blanket and placed him on the couch and told him  _ not to move from that spot or so help me. _

 

He was still totally out of it. Keith could see his blank stare over his cup of space tea, and when Hunk wrapped an arm around him, nothing on his face changed. 

 

He mouthed words to himself, shaping his lips around the syllables. Keith was entranced. 

 

“Maybe I wasn’t useless after all…” he muttered, then sank lower in his chair and gave a low chuckle. 

 

Everyone in the room froze, then gave each other uncomfortable glances. Keith shifted on his couch so his knees were together, and Shiro leaned forward on his knees. 

 

“Lance?” Shiro asked. “What did you mean, maybe you weren’t  _ useless?” _

 

Lance jumped. His tea splashed in his cup, and for a moment, Keith thought it would spill. “Oh, I… I said that out loud, didn’t I?”

 

_ My inner monologue suddenly became my outer monologue!  _ Keith thought, a dumb quote from an even dumber tv show. 

 

“Yeah, you did,” Shiro said, still looking like a concerned parent. “Why would you think you’re useless?”

 

Lance’s eyes trailed away, and he said, “I, uh… hey, this was… this was supposed to be a  _ happy _ moment, right? Let’s talk about this later.”

 

“This is supposed to be a  _ you _ moment,” Shiro said. “As of right this second. We’re talking about  _ you _ and  _ your _ problems. Okay?”

 

Lance shrunk in his chair. “Never talking about this, actually, would be best.”

 

“Paladins should have  _ no _ secrets between them,” Allura said, emphasis on the  _ no. _ “Lance, you must tell your friends what is bothering you.”

 

Lance stayed quiet. As it slowly became obvious he wasn’t going to say a word, Allura stood up. 

 

“Perhaps this is a moment to speak of your strengths, rather than your weaknesses,” she said. “Paladins, please follow me.”

 

She strode out the door, her royalty making her believe they would all follow without question. Lance abandoned his blanket but brought his tea. 

 

Allura had opened the star map in the control room. Right where her heart would be if it was three feet in front of her body, the rainbow of Lions sat, the tiny holograms playing with each other. 

 

The paladins silently spread out around her in a rough semicircle with Lance at their center. None of them wanted to let him get too far away. 

 

Allura waved a gentle hand, and the image of the Blue Lion popped her head up. She bounded over to Lance and pressed her nose to his face, making him laugh and grin. 

 

“The Blue Lion,” Allura began, then cleared her throat. “The Blue Lion is the most accepting of all the lions, but also the most loyal. Her paladin is someone who has kindness at the forefront of their heart, who accepts all and embraces it. Someone who does everything they can to help others… even—” she paused and had to look away for a second. “Even at the cost of their own life.” Her voice went high at the end, and she was silent for a long moment. Keith blinked hard enough that he saw stars. 

 

Allura breathed out, then continued. “As a leg of Voltron, you lift the team up and hold them together. This is why you, Lance, are the pilot of the Blue Lion.”

 

Lance gasped for words. He didn't move, though the tea in his mug shuddered from vibrations. The Blue Lion poked its nose into his cheek like it expected resistance. “I….” 

 

“Not to mention you’re the team’s sharpshooter,” Shiro said, placing a hand on Lance’s shoulder. “We wouldn’t be able to do a thing without you helping us.”

 

“We were only able to defeat Zarkon because you moved Voltron out of the way of that blast,” Pidge added. “You saved us.  _ All  _ of us. You’re the real hero here.”

 

“We can go home,” Hunk said, “you can see your family again. Because of what you did. Movie nights, all of us together. Keith can burn the popcorn.”

 

Keith watched Lance’s walls fall apart from everyone’s nice words. He was compelled to step forward too, but he kept uncrossing and crossing his arms, not knowing what to do with himself. He finally settled on putting them in his pockets. 

 

“Uh…” Keith began, very eloquently. “I heard what you said, too. Um. I don’t—I don’t  _ hate _ you, Lance why would I—” He shoved a hand through his hair. “I heard what you said.”

 

Lance tightened his grip on his tea. He had looked at Keith, a lost expression on his face, like he was a thousand miles away and everything was going fuzzy. Then he looked into his tea like it would hold all the answers. “Yeah. Okay. Keith, it’s—it’s okay if you—if you hate me. If you want to hate me, or whatever, that’s, that’s fine—it’s fine…” Lance trailed off, his shoulders becoming more hunched with every stutter and stunted sentence. 

 

“Lance, I don’t  _ hate _ you,” Keith said, in the most gentle tone he could muster. “Lance, I…” His feet moved him a couple steps forward. “I’ve never hated you.”

 

Lance took a step back. Keith felt the shift in the mood of the room. The others looked away; Keith hadn’t talked about this with anyone but he was glad some of them, at least, understood. 

 

Lance put down his cup of tea and re-took a step forward. He was right in front of Keith. Neither of them could see anyone else. 

 

“Were you asking for something like this?” Keith asked, whisper-soft. He put a hand on Lance’s bicep, then let it slide lower, closer to Lance’s elbow. 

 

“I thought… I thought you’d just brush me off,” Lance murmured. He didn’t quite meet Keith’s eyes, and his face went red. 

 

“Why would I?”

 

Lance didn’t respond for a moment, and Keith held his breath, not willing to ruin what they had between them. 

 

“Because… because you… you’ve done so  _ much—so much— _ and I’m just… I’m just me, you know? And I—I wish it wasn’t you— _ you _ that I was admitting this to because then I could pretend! I could pretend I knew—I could pretend I know what I’m doing—I don’t know what I’m doing—and I could—I could brush it off, you know? I could brush it off when I get turned down and of  _ course  _ I’m going to get turned down, and, like, because you’re  _ you _ and—”

 

Keith closed the stream of words the only way he knew how. Lance’s lips were rougher than he expected. 

 

“Stop,” Keith said softly, a stark contrast from Lance’s sharp panic. “Stop bringing yourself down. You—ha! You are  _ so  _ important. You’re the reason Zarkon is gone! We wouldn’t know what to do if you… if you…” Keith couldn’t bring himself to finish. 

 

“If I had died,” Lance said for him, his voice empty of all emotions. “Oh.”

 

Keith closed his eyes, his hand still on Lance’s bicep. He missed the way Lance interacted with the rest of the paladins. He missed the gradual smile that worked its way onto Lance’s face. 

 

“Hey, Kee,” Lance said, a smile hidden behind the curl of the vowels. 

 

Keith looked up in surprise. Lance’s lips curled to the left. “Since when do you call me  _ Kee?” _

 

“Since now, I guess,” Lance said, letting his shoulder lift just high enough to balance his smirk. “Smile for me? You’re too serious all the time.”

 

“What?” Keith searched Lance’s eyes, looking for malice, looking for that  _ Ha! Prank’d!  _ sign. It wasn’t there. 

 

A laugh—a giggle bubbled out of Keith, one he couldn’t control. “Uh, why don’t you kiss me and we’ll see what’s what.”

 

Lance happily complied.

 

 

 

END

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Let me just say, it was truly an honor to remix this fic. I had such a fun time—everyone needs to go drop kudos and comments on the original! http://archiveofourown.org/works/11952270
> 
> Thank you for reading! This was part of the VLD Fanfic Remix: https://vldfanficremix2017.tumblr.com/: an awesome project filled with awesome people! Comments and kudos are always appreciated!


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